Well, if you had known me a few years ago, you would know how easy it was to piss me off! Not that it isn’t anymore, but now I have finally learnt the art of controlling anger. I too have breakdowns, because ,well I’m a human made out of flesh and blood, a touchy heart and an over-thinking mind, but now I don’t let the anger over power me, like before!
And believe it or not, it has made life easy!
If like me, your blood boils, when your 3-year-old refuses to corporate? Or you want to yell at the top of your lungs when your hair won’t set? You need to work on your anger issues.
As much as it’s a natural emotion and also a sign of emotional stability, it can create havoc and affect both your health as well as your relationship with others, if not kept under control.
So here’s how to control your anger, with these easy to follow, anger management techniques.
1. Think before it’s too late
The most common and ,in my opinion, the worst side effect of anger is the time when you yell or utter complete nonsense when furious. And yes, we all regret later on!
When angry, our stability to think obviously vanishes. The biggest mistake people do, in such situations, is speak without a second thought.
The first thing that therapists suggest is to keep silent when in anger. If that isn’t possible, think! Weigh your words out in your mind, before throwing them at the other person. Because, we all know that in the heat of the moment, we spill out stuff, which we most definitely regret later.
2. Don’t, and we repeat, DO NOT bottle up your feelings
Yes, I did ask you to keep quiet, during the heat of the moment, but by that, I’m not suggesting you to keep your mouth shut for the rest of your life.
Make sure, after the anger has subsided and you have thought through, share how you feel. I do not mean, start a fight. But like casual adults try to talk the situation out.
Because, if you bottle your feelings up, just for the sake of letting things go and not create a scene, it will sink into your heart and at one point in life, you will regret it.
Also, if you don’t voice your opinion, people will try to overcome you.
So rule of the thumb:
- - Never let, either anger or people, overcome you!
3. Subscribe to a Gym
Yup, this is one of the widely used anger management techniques! At times, your body is under immense pressure and stress, which eventually builds up anger.
You must have often heard about enrolling into a boxing program if you feel stressed. I always thought, why boxing, why not just sort the solution at hand rather than punching utterly useless bags?
Well here’s how it works:
Research has proved that when one exercises, cortisol - which is a stress hormone and causes symptoms such as nervousness, anxiety, and anger, is burned down. This eventually results in a happier and calmer person.
So if, like me, you too have anger issues where you feel like banging your head against the wall when things don’t go as planned, earlier. You need to enroll yourself in a gym and get rid of the excess stress hormones.
4. Take a break from the stressful surroundings
This is one of the best and quick working anger management techniques that I have come across, so far! When surrounded by a stressful situation, be it work related or personal, one doesn’t think about anything other than the stressful situation at hand, until it is completely resolved (which is rarely the case) or your brain goes numb from over-thinking.
Throwing it a couple years back – If I was stuck in a problem, I would sit all day, without letting myself involve into any distractions, thinking what had led to the dreadful situation. My next question to myself was what I could have done to save myself. But needless to say, it was useless. Other than making me furious and disappointed, it did nothing!
But thankfully, later on, I learned about this anger therapy and Boy, was I surprised!
From that day till today, if things don’t work out, I don’t stress my brain all day trying to make ends meet. I let it go. It's like pausing the situation, right there.
Because a stressed out brain is to do no work, at all. Brains become hostile to stressed environments, rendering us from making the right decisions.
So, instead, I tend to indulge myself in something I love doing, such as cooking which, believe it or not, is a natural stress-buster. Here’s proof!
This de-stresses my mind, turning it back, into the right environment for making useful decisions.
That’s why they say, a vacation is not what you want but something that you need, especially after taking into account, how stressful our lifestyles have gotten.
5. The last one on the list, Stay positive
Last, but certainly the most important, out of all anger management techniques.
Anger, stress, depression are all results of negativity. While you can drown yourself in the filthy consequences of negativity, a far better choice would be to counterattack it by keeping your head high and mind positive.
At work or home, learning to stay positive even in the gravest of situations is a commendable skill.
By remaining positive, we mean, to work towards solving the problem at hand rather than digging up evidence; in order to find out what had led to the situation, in the first place.
I know, we all want to know what mistakes we make, but doing so, under an already regretful and stressful situation is like digging yourself into a hole.
So, don’t! Rather, focus on turning the upside down situation, upright! Work towards finding a solution because digging into the past is no good unless of course, you know how to time travel.
Are you a hot head, looking to manage your anger? Were the techniques helpful? If not, please make sure to seek help from your doctor.
Unsure if you need help? Take this quiz and you will know!