I will never see him/her again…!
Oh! What that person has done to me…!
These stressful thoughts and anxious moments’ impulse you to break up with someone you love! Quarrels with partner, emotional abuse and lack of trust are major reasons for break up.
OMG…! He’s having affair with someone else!
He does not love me anymore…!
These negative thoughts trigger a change in attitude, behavior and feelings; this leads you towards break up. Breaking up with someone you love is always tough, as Joe Bradley says in the movie Roman holiday, “I don’t know how to say goodbye. I can’t think of any words.”
Relationships are important for all of us. But, it does not mean that we have to sacrifice our happiness, peace of mind and lifestyle to be in relationship with somebody, right? We are, what we are! Why should we change ourselves for others!
Your partner has to accept you as the person you really are!
One thing you need to keep in mind; break up is LAST stage in any relationship (towards the end). It is very immoral and unethical to break up with someone due to small disputes, few annoying habits etc. These are part of life! And to be honest, such situations are beauty of every relationship.
Things to consider before breaking up with someone you Love
1. You are not comfortable with your partner
Compatibility is the base of every relationship. If you are lacking harmony in your relationship, you’ll surely consider break up! But, there are a lot of questions regarding identifications of recklessness in a relationship.
Is your partner too demanding? Does he/she always ask you to change your habits? Do you bicker all the time? If answer to all these questions is, YES! You are lacking consensus with your partner! It is time for you to reexamine your relationship!
But, before proceeding, just analyze yourself from your lover’s perspective. Are they fair? Inspect your habits. Most importantly, investigate reasons behind quarrel between you both. If you find yourself clear in all these allegations, these will help you overcome your fear of breaking up with someone you really love. You are good to move ahead!
2. You are having trust Issues
A relationship cannot excel without trust! Fidelity doubt is harmful for the growth of a relationship. How can you live with a person who is not trustworthy? NO! Absolutely, this is a genuine point!
But, why are you doubting your partner’s fidelity? What is the reason behind your insecurity? What proof do you have that he/she is not faithful to you?
These are important questions for you to investigate before jumping to any conclusions, right?
Choose a quiet place, take a long breath, close your eyes, and start over! Review all events which compel you to impose a doubt.
Is your partner not having sex with you? Is he/she not spending time with you? What changed? Do you think he/she is cheating on you? Does he/she feel bored with you? Most importantly, is your partner having an affair behind your back? Answers to these questions will guide you to a conclusion!
After clearing all doubts, it is time for you to get your evidences on the questions, like;
What proof do you have that your partner is having an affair? Is it a phone call which let you to doubt him/her? A late night chatting (assuming you are asleep)? A locked phone gallery and contacts list?
You can discuss these things with your lover in a polite manner. Protecting phone with password does not mean that he/she is hiding something from you. A phone call attended in separation does not prove him/her guilty. Do clear things off at the earliest before breaking up!
Breaking up with someone you love requires a solid reason and valid proof to prove your companion, a culprit of your love and loyalty!
3. You like your partner but Love someone else
Ooohh, you got mixed feelings……GOSH!
YES! Believe me, it happens! I know, it sounds a bit filmy! But you have to admit it. I do not consider it wrong, in terms of choice, I mean. I suggest, choose carefully! Having more options is not bad, but, leaving someone without a reason is bad! I broke up with someone I love, and it was harder than I thought, so, I truly understand the pain of rejection!
Talk to your partner, let him/her know what you are really looking for! Discuss your fascination with that person. It’ll help a lot! Prepare yourself for answering TOUGH questions, like;
Don’t I love you? Don’t you find me attractive? What about my feelings for you? Why you chose me in the first place? Why are you acting strange?
No doubt, these questions are not mandatory to answer, but answer them to your partner to prevent them from creating any emotional drama. Praise your partner’s loyalty, affection and respect, as a gesture of goodwill!
4. You are not a priority
Friends, job, game, and parents; all are important! But, how is it possible that you have no time for the love of your life…? If you are unable to spend time with your sweetheart, it raises a lot of questions about your love, right?
It depicts your priorities. If your partner is not your priority, how can you claim your love? A candle light dinner, late night movie or romantic conversations enhance mutual affection and understanding. What if you are missing out all these moments? Unconsciously, this gap builds a wall between you and your companion.
Love cannot bear loneliness! Your partner will prefer break up than being treated like this because they or anyone doesn’t deserve such a humiliation of their love!
Must Read How to Focus on yourself after a Breakup